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Assistance Needed: DEI Trainer Obsessing Over Kink Topic

DEI Trainer, help, Kink, Talking



Dear Emily,

Working with individuals who are considerate and respectful is a positive experience. However, there are instances where coworkers, particularly from an older generation, misgender younger colleagues who identify as they/them. This has caused hurt feelings and led to some trans workers leaving the organization. In response, a request was made for cultural competency training on pronoun use, which was finally approved after a lengthy process. However, the choice of trainer raised some concerns.

The trainer, while belonging to various identity groups, including being trans, also identifies as “kinky.” This aspect of their identity was heavily emphasized in the training, much to the confusion and discomfort of employees. Questions arose about the relevance of discussing kink in a workplace training session. Colleagues who supported the training now feel conflicted about the focus on sexual preferences rather than the intended subject matter.

The dilemma faced by the letter writer, Mx. Vanilla, highlights the importance of maintaining professionalism in the workplace. Bringing up personal sexual proclivities during a training session can create an uncomfortable and inappropriate setting. It is essential to establish boundaries between personal and professional conversations to ensure a respectful and inclusive environment for all employees.

In such situations, it may be necessary to provide constructive feedback to the trainer or the organization responsible for hiring them. Feedback should focus on the training content and its relevance to the intended audience, rather than personal judgments or shaming. Seeking a dedicated in-house Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) manager to oversee these training sessions could prevent future issues and provide employees with a safe space to address concerns.

Ultimately, the goal should be to create a workplace that is inclusive, respectful, and free of unnecessary distractions or discomfort. By advocating for appropriate training practices and establishing clear boundaries, employees can work towards a more harmonious and understanding work environment.

Best regards,
[Your Name]



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